BURNING RING OF FIRE

Just pulled into Pokhara (Nepal) a couple hours ago. Man, I love Nepal. Worlds away from India in every way except geography - the people, the pace, the (relatively) garbage-free roads, the scenery, just everything.

A spectacular rain/thunder/lightening storm capped off our stay in Shimla, then I enlisted a porter the next morning to carry my huge bag down the treacherously steep and monkey-filled stairways and tunnels to Oscar. A very long drive day (about 14 hours) ensued, complete with a thwarted bush camp experience because we couldn't find any bush in which to camp. Leading to the late night check-in at a SKANKY hotel in Dehradun. Lest you think that I am being a snob, let me back it up with some rationale. Ant/moth/gecko infestation (depending on room), pre-existing shit in toilet/puke in sink (again depending on room), massive # of bed bug bites (equal opportunity in all rooms).

After that refreshing night's sleep, we headed off to Corbett National Park for two nights and our last hooray in India. The campsite in a "lovely Mango grove" turned out to be camping in a stone-covered parking lot as the grass was being replanted, resulting in almost all upgrading to very nice rooms. An elephant safari and a jeep safari were both very fun, but no wildlife to be seen other than a few birds and several deer. Sigh.

We made our way to the border with four fewer passengers (not their cup of tea) and a driver switch-out due to Indian visa issues at the craziest little border ever - down a dirt road where the only other travelers were two motorcyclists. Despite the lack of people, we were still on the Indian side for a couple hours as the two border agents laboriously and slooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwlllllllllllllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyy made copies of all our passports, then hand-copied all the info from our departure forms into a notebook, requiring many white-outs and checking/rechecking before finally stamping and sending us on our way. What in the world does India do with what must be hundreds of thousands of these books full of passport details? They must be mouldering in warehouses all over the country. Surely there must be a more efficient process?

Nepal side was very quick and efficient, then we were on our way to Bardia National Park. Another REALLY long drive-day. The deeper we got into Nepal, the more eerie little fires we saw in the deep dark countryside. Dozens of them. Some isolated little patches, some rings that traversed up mountains, others that looked like torches in trees. We thought there must be some type of festival going on. A scary one with old pagan roots where, perhaps, Westerners in large orange/white trucks were ritually sacrificed. Our fear of the fire was soon supplanted by the fear that we would drown, as Oscar trundled down pitch-black jungle roads over skinny little bridges that were SO skinny that his back tires were hanging into space and we were listing from side to side. We made it to the gorgeous Forest Hideaway VERY late and ate the delish dinner they'd prepared, quaffed our first of many Nepali brewskis and all went to bed (not tents - every single one of us upgraded to rooms).

Up VERY early the next morning for a jeep safari. A few minutes after we settle ourselves on the bench in our rustic old jeep, it breaks and I now have a bruise the size of a pear and a huge scrape on my right ass cheek as a souvenir. A hasty repair was made, but had to be repeated a couple times throughout the morning. Again, no lions or tigers or bears. Oh my. I am destined to never see a leopard in the wild.

But, remember those fires I was mentioning? Well, it turns out that they were not festive-yet-spooky man-made events. They were actually spontaneous forest fires because it is SO hot and dry. And how did we discover this? Well, the first clue was all the smoke and smoldering leaves/logs and blackened vines as we were riding deep within Bardia (one of only two jeeps in the whole park that morning). The second clue was when we came to a screeching halt because that wall of flames in front of us was the remnants of the wooden bridge we needed to cross to get out. Remnants, because the fire had completely burned down the far side of the bridge. The third and final clue was when we retraced our path and it was blocked by a fast-moving three-sided ring of VERY HOT and VERY HIGH flames. So down escape route #3 it was and no afternoon jungle walks.

We spent last night in Tansen, at a GREAT hotel with fabulous views and a passable red wine, I was kissed/groped by a very drunk Nepalese man at our lunch stop today, who kept saying "I'm sorry" before one of the other pax kicked him in the shin to get him off me. And now I'm at an internet cafe. Such is life. Can't believe that the trip ends in just a couple days. Delhi seems like it was YEARS ago instead of two weeks and Larium pills ago!